FART CHART

A vain person:

One who loves the smell of his own fart.

Amiable person:

One who loves the smell of other people's farts.

Proud person:

One who thinks his farts are exceptionally pleasant.

Shy person:

One who releases silent farts then blushes.

Impudent person:

One who farts out loud then laughs.

Scientific person:

One who farts regularly but is concerned with pollution.

Unfortunate person:

One who tries to fart but shits instead.

Nervous person:

One who stops in the middle of a fart.

Honest person:

One who admits they farted but offers a good medical reason.

Dishonest person:

One who farts and blames the dog.

Foolish person:

One who suppresses a fart for hours.

Thrifty person:

One who always has farts in reserve.

Anti-social person:

One who excuses himself and farts in private.

Strategic person:

One who conceals his farts by loud laughter.

Intellectual person:

One who can determine the smell of his neighbour's fart.

Athletic person:

One who farts at the slightest exterion.

Sadistic person:

One who farts in bed, then fluffs the covers over his bed.

Miserable person:

One who farts then starts crying.

Aquatic person:

One who farts in the bath and then bursts the bubbles with his toes.